Thursday, February 21, 2008

If I'm laughing, it must be two weeks.

I had the strangest few minutes this morning. I made my coffee, opened the balcony door, took a deep breath of the morning air, then casually put my cup down and started to walk about – first in the direction of the side tables, then the shelf my music system sits on, then to my dining table, not impatient yet, just puzzled at something unaccountably missing from the place it should be. I suddenly stopped the automaton-like wandering and laughed. I was looking for my cigarettes. Without conscious thought. So this is why they say not to have any cigarettes stashed away anywhere. The relapse can happen involuntarily. How fascinating.

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